


sweet dreams are made of this ( everybody's looking for something )

by wearealltalesintheend



Series: Ravi Chakrabarti Appreciation Week 2017 [2]
Category: iZombie (Comics), iZombie (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, F/M, M/M, Social Media AU, chat fic sort of, everyone else is human
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-24
Updated: 2017-09-24
Packaged: 2019-01-04 10:26:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12167076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wearealltalesintheend/pseuds/wearealltalesintheend
Summary: "HIRING!Looking for a barista, schedule open for debate.Must not be a hipster.Must know how to make coffee.Must have seen Star Wars at least once.For more info, salary, etc, contact 555 555 666"or alternatively, the one where Ravi owns a coffeeshop, Liv needs a job, and Blaine buys the bakery across the street; told by facebook status, snippets of conversations, texts, calls, and post-its.





	sweet dreams are made of this ( everybody's looking for something )

**Author's Note:**

> Yo, I'm so late, I know.
> 
> But here's this total mess of an AU. Two AUs actually. 
> 
> Just to clarify, this is the "Ravi owns a coffee shop and Liv is the new barista and Blaine owns the bakery across the street" AU mixed and stirred with the "Social Media Mess" AU.
> 
> Written for Ravi Chakrabarti Appreciation Week. Day 6: Au
> 
> I hope y'all enjoy this trainwreck.

 

_[Written on a paper taped to the Coffee shop’s glass door]_

 

# HIRING!

Looking for a barista, schedule open for debate.

Must _not_ be a hipster.

Must know how to make coffee.

Must have seen Star Wars at least once.

For more info, salary, etc, contact 555 555 666

 

*******

 

**Olivia Moore**

_online_

 

Hi!

It’s Olivia, your new employee?

Thanks again for hiring me,

I just wanted to let you know I’ll be there first thing tomorrow morning.

 

Hey!

fantastic!!

if u beat me there, there’s a key inside the fake flower pot

 

Okay! That’s great!

I’ll be there!

 

well then

until tomorrow, Olivia Moore!

 

***

 

**Olivia**

_Online_

 

hey

can i ask a favor?

 

sure thing

shoot

 

okay so

i have a few art pieces around the apt

and i was thinking

they would look pretty good in the coffeeshop

 

you wanna hang your paintings

in the shop?

 

yes?

 

bring them over tmw

its gonna be way cooler than the starbucks deco

 

***

 

**Liv**

_Online_

 

hey do u wanna parachute?

 

do i wanna know?

thats a no btw

 

you are no fun

 

and you are clinically insane

 

***

 

**Liv**

_Offline_

 

Liv

u didnt tell me

your roommate was a goddess

thats kind of important information

ugh fine go have fun and leave me

to suffer through my heartache

alone

 

***

 

**Liv**

_Online_

 

so

your ex fiance came over

 

omg major was there?

 

yep

his order had so much sugar

im surprised he didnt go into diabetic coma

 

yeah

he has a sweet tooth

 

no

i have a sweet tooth

he has an entire sweet skeleton

but i digress

more importantly,

should i ban him from ever coming in again?

 

what?

 

we can hang posters

with BANNED

written in big bold letters

old west style

 

thanks but no

we’re cool

trying the whole

“being friends” again thing

 

so

he’ll be around?

 

i think so?

idk

but its cool

you liked him, didnt u?

 

oh thank god

YES

he has a fantastic sound system

and im totally going to kick his ass at Halo

 

oh no

not you too

 

oh yes

 

***

 

**Liv**

_Online_

 

itz 6:00

in thr bloodt morning

y am awake

 

bc we have tai chi in the park!

 

i hete u

and everythinf u stand for

 

***

_call connecting….._

 

**unknown:** 911 what’s your emergency?

 

**Liv:** thank god, hi, my friend fell down a slope and he’s passed out. I think he may have a concussion and a broken arm. Possibly bruised ribs, but he’s still unconscious. We don’t have a car-

 

**Operator:** it’s alright, what is your name, ma’am?

 

**Liv:** it’s Olivia Moore, I’m a trained doctor-

 

**Operator:** And where are you calling from?

 

**Liv:** My friend’s phone- his name is Ravi Chakrabarti.

 

**Operator:** And where are you and your friend?

 

**Liv:** Lincoln Park, near the water fountain, down that damn slope and off the trail.

 

**Operator:** Okay, we’re dispatching an unit as we speak. Ma’am, your friend is going to be alright.

 

**Liv:** I know, I know, thank you.

 

_call ended._

 

***

**Liv**

_Online_

 

Ravi

im so sorry

 

its fine Liv

it wasnt your fault

i tripped and fell

it happens

 

yeah but still

you were there bc of

my stupid tai chi

 

yeah about that

im never doing tai chi

ever again

ah so you admit it was stupid

 

ugh im over it

no more tai chi for me either

sorry again

 

if u apologize again

im going to fire u

besides its just a cracked wrist

and not, say

a broken arm and bruised ribs

 

omg

i was freaked out okay?

u were passed out and there were bruises

 

sure thing doc

did u diagnose me with pneumonia while u were at it too?

 

i plead the fifth

also im coming over with muffins later

 

ah yes

im glad fruit baskets have been retired in favour of more sugared goods

long live glicosis

 

*favor

oh and Clive says its just a scratch, stop being dramatic

and Major says scars are badges of honor

aaaaand Peyton asked about u,

and says, and i quote, poor thing, i hope he gets well soon

 

*honour

and im touched my customers love me so

and tell clive to stop undermining my pain

and ofc major would say that

and i told u, peyton and i, we had a moment

 

yeah right

also major was really worried

so i gave him your number

i didnt know you were friends?

 

its fine

we bonded over video games

and star wars

 

im glad to hear that

u both need more friends

nerds

 

oh shut it u

and hurry with those muffins, peasant

 

***

 

**Major**

_Online_

 

Hi!

It’s Major

Liv said you had an accident?

 

hey

well not an accident per se

i may have fallen a little tho?

 

a little?

but are u okay man?

i mean, you werent working today

 

oh no im perfectly fine

just a tiny crack in the wrist

wasnt even that concussed

and i wasnt working today

bc liv literally shooed me out of the door

 

you were concussed??????

also arent u her boss?

 

pfff noo

i was just passed out for a minute there

and pls have u met liv?

she barricaded the doors

i half expected her to start singing

les mis at me

 

you were passed out???

listen you’re not very good

at the whole reassuring thing buddy

and who would you be then? javert?

 

nah im just surROUNDED BY MOTHER HENS

ofc not id be marius

surviving the whole thing

 

excuse me for worrying

i need my caffeine doses

well id like to say id be enjolras

but id nail on my own

 

uh and here i thought all of u cared

major

ive seen you singing before

if u were eponine,

id shoot you too

im pretty sure u  scared away a few customers that day

 

i

yeah no

guilty as charged

but ive seen u singing too

and if i were cosette id wouldnt be singing no harmonies

 

pfff i have enough charm to make up for it

hey i have to go

liv is trying to murder my doorbell

 

sure go rescue your household

take care of yourself man

and good luck with those muffins

 

***

_call connecting..........._

 

_call connecting………._

 

_call connecting…………._

 

**Peyton:** Hello?

 

**Ravi:** Peyton? Hi, it’s Ravi- from the coffee shop? _[nervous laughter]_

 

**Peyton:** Oh, Ravi, hey, is everything okay?

 

**Ravi:** yeah, yes, it’s fine. I was just, uh, wondering if you would be free, this Friday? Or Saturday- I have a pretty flexible schedule, so any day works for me. And maybe, if you were, we could, maybe, go to dinner? Go have dinner, I mean. If you want, that is.

 

**Peyton:** Are you asking me out?

 

**Ravi:** Maybe? Is it working? _[laughter]_

 

**Peyton:** _[laughter]_ sure, does 8pm works for you? I know a place.

 

**Ravi:** Absolutely. Yes. Definitely. Perfect. 8pm it is. See you later, then?

 

**Peyton:** Yup, it’s a date. I can’t wait. Bye, Ravi.

 

_call ended._

 

***

 

**Ravi** **Chakrabarti** changed his status from **Single** to

 

**In a Relationship** with **Peyton** **Charles.**

 

_Comments_

**Olivia** **Moore** OMG I can’t believe it! congrats, you guys!

**Major** **Lilywhite** damn congratulations!

**Evan** **Moore** what?? why am I always the last to know???

**Peyton** **Charles** ♡

 

***

**Peyton**

_Offline_

 

_Ravi sent “lovebirds.jpg”_

 

guess what

i cant believe they didnt tell us

shame on them

 

***

**Liv**

_Online_

 

i cant believe u convinced me

to do this

 

its for the greater good

 

well tell that to clive

when he inevitably has to arrest me

 

pfffff there is nothing wrong

with spending your day outside

 

but im sure there is a few laws against

industrial espionage

and loitering

 

dont be dramatic

blaine is up to something

i know

 

ugh fine

that he may be

there is a lot of smoke coming out the bakery

 

SEE

UP TO SOMETHING

Ravi?

?????????

omg did he murder you?

omg hE IS SWEENEY TODD ISNT HE?

 

Liv no

ew

why is that the first thing your mind jump to?

also sweeney todd was the barber

ms lovett was the pie maker

anyway sorry

major almost gave me a heart attack

 

oh thank god

thats even more disturbing btw

tell major to stay with u

the more witnesses the better

 

***

 

_[ Written on a yellow post it, taped to the coffee machine ]_

 

Liv,

If I hear one more Justin Bieber song on the speakers

I’m going to dye all your aprons neon green

 

***

 

**Major**

_Online_

 

hey

its game night

are u coming over?

 

yeah

im almost done here

fridays are the worst

 

ok

im ordering pizza then

im so kicking your ass on Halo later

 

lots of cheese pls

u wish

 

***

_[ Written in a green post-it note, taped over the yellow one ]_

 

Ravi,

it was playing **oops, I did it again** yesterday. You can’t judge me.

Also, I’m over it.

 

***

**Peyton**

_Online_

 

we need to talk

 

***

 

**Ravi** **Chakrabarti** changed his status from **In a Relationship** to **Single**.

 

***

 

**Liv**

_Online_

 

Oh Ravi

im so sorry

i swear i had no idea

 

i know

its fine

we had been dating for

a couple of weeks only

ill be fine

 

damn her job

europe is so far

im going to miss her so much

 

god

i miss her already

 

***

 

**Major**

_Online_

 

Im coming over

and im bringing alcohol

 

you dont have to

ill be fine

i told u

 

that wasnt a question

im omw

i have whiskey and vodka

 

its not that bad

ill be fine

 

but you’re not fine right now

and u shouldn’t be alone

so

open your door

 

what

 

im outside

open the door

i come bearing gifts

 

***

 

**Unknown**

_Online_

 

you are going to sell me your cute little coffee shop

 

how did you even get my number?

 

pffffffff

ye man of little faith

I am Vaughn du Clark

I can do anything

 

except buy my place

now leave me alone

 

we’ll see

Dr. Chakrabarti

we’ll see

 

...okay

bc that wasnt creepy at all

im blocking your number now

 

***

 

**Liv**

_Online_

 

i broke up with Major

for real this time

 

what

why?

you guys were all over each other

what happened?

 

nothing really

its just

idk

i guess im just not the same

it wasnt working anymore

 

im sorry liv

you dont have to come in today

take the day off

go eat lots of ice cream

 

im fine

really

its for the best

but thanks Ravi

you’re the best

 

its nothing liv

im here if u need anything

 

***

 

**Major**

_Online_

 

hey

liv told me what happened

how are u holding up?

 

hi

im fine

it was the right decision

it just wasnt us, you know?

i think

we havent been really in love

for a while now

 

im sorry

even so

im sorry it didnt work out

 

thanks man

but im fine

ppl change

and thats okay

i can accept that

 

if you need anything,

im here

 

thanks ravi

 

well you helped me when i was in a bit of a funk

its only fair i help you out now

 

in that case

i wouldnt mind a few beers

 

got it

 

***

 

 

**Liv**

_Online_

 

did you know

major broke into blaines bakery?

 

he did what now??????

 

break into the bakery/drug ring

clive sorted it out

 

im going to kill him

well

get in line

we can have matching shirts

 

***

 

 

**Major**

_Online_

 

i know you are mad

but i can explain

 

mad???

im bloody livid

i was mad three hours ago

now im beyond mad

 

i know

and i dont blame you

i get it

 

no no no

u definitely dont get it

what were u thinking????

 

well

that i could prove

blaine is a drug dealer?

 

he is dangerous!

he couldve killed you

or worse!

 

i see your point but

man

u havent seen the kids in the shelter

this drug

its really bad

 

yeah

and those kids

they need u alive major

playing vigilante is not the right way

now come to the shop

Liv wants to yell at you

and so do i for that matter

 

will u make me a hot chocolate?

 

no

maybe

but yelling first

bloody idiot

 

***

 

_[ Written on a yellow post-it note, taped to the fridge ]_

 

Liv,

just go talk to the hot musician. He’s moping. It’s sad.

no one can take this angst.

 

***

 

 

**Liv**

_Online_

 

Liv and Lowell

on a date

K-I-S-S-I-NG

 

what are you

6yo?

 

***

 

**Lowell**

_Online_

 

so

open mic this friday right?

 

yep

glad you mentioned that

im recruiting u now

 

for what?

singing? cause liv did that last night already

she was pretty convincing

 

okay first of all, no not that

second of all, TMI MATE

third, ew eww ew

TMI

before i go bleach my brain

im recruiting u for taping flyers

everywhere

 

do i get free tea?

 

fine

 

then sure

i can do that

 

lovely

u can come pick up the flyers

 

and my free tea

 

***

 

_[ written on a flyer, taped to a tree on Lincoln Park ]_

 

# Open Mic Friday

_A New Hope_ Coffee Shop is proud to announce the first **_Open Mic Friday_ **!

 

It’s happening this week, May, the 5th, at Cherry st.

 

Come join us for excellent music and fantastic drinks.

 

***

 

**Major**

_Online_

 

hey

whats this about

an open mic night?

 

pls tell me you are not thinking

of joining?

 

ha ha ha

no im not

but its a great idea tho

 

i hope so

i sent lowell to tape flyers

all around the park

 

nah man, it’ll be a success

if liv’s new boyfriend can really sing

 

oh

OH sorry i forgot

are u going to be okay?

 

yeah

im over it

liv and i are just friends

and im happy she found someone

 

oh thats great

i’ll see you friday then?

 

yeah

i wouldnt miss it for the world

 

***

 

**Lowell**

_Online_

 

Hi Ravi

thanks for this man

it was awesome

 

***

 

**Liv**

_Online_

 

WE SO NEED TO DO THIS AGAIN

IT WAS AMAZINGG

omg i cant believe you’re already asleep

 

***

 

**Major**

_Online_

 

i knew it would be a success

told ya

good night buddy

 

***

**Liv**

_Online_

 

I cant believe she’s back

this is just

wow

 

i know right

she didnt tell you either?

 

no???

she said she wanted

to make a surprise

 

i cant believe peyton is back

but im so glad

i missed her

 

god

me too

are you guys

u know

back together?

 

no

we talked last night

no

its been a long time

things have changed

 

oh im sorry?

 

nah

its cool

we’re back to being friends

and being soundly defeated on her

drinking games

 

tsk tsk

u should know better

no one beats peyton

in drinking

 

yeah

im a fool and dont i know it

 

***

**Major**

_Online_

 

game night?

 

hell yeah

 

*******

 

**Liv**

_Online_

 

sooo

 

we talked abt it Liv

theres no one

 

yea

and thats a lie

come on

who is it

 

nobody

i dont have a crush

shut up

 

ravi

come ooon

u feel better if you talk abt it

 

im ignoring u now

go away

 

***

 

**Unknown Number**

_Online_

 

Remember doc

tomorrow morning

you sell this place,

i get you your little ol’ job back

its up to you

tick tock, doc

tick tock

 

***

 

**Liv**

_Online_

 

Ravi

pls dont sell this place

this is the best thing that happened to me

pls dont sell this place

and dont move to Atlanta

you’re my best friend

 

***

 

**Peyton**

_Online_

 

If you sell this place

im kicking your ass

 

***

 

**Clive**

_Online_

 

Liv says

i should say it would be

upsetting

if you were to shut this place down

so don’t.

and we’re never mentioning this again.

 

***

 

**Major**

_Offline_

 

so

are u okay man?

i havent seen u in forever

major?

can we talk?

major??

 

***

 

**The Coffee Squad**

_Ravi, Liv, Major, Clive and Peyton_

 

_Liv created “The Coffee Squad”._

 

_Liv added Ravi, Major, Clive, Peyton to the group._

 

**Liv**

yall

guess what i just witnessed

 

**Ravi**

DONT YOU DARE OLIVIA

 

**Liv**

too late

 

_Liv sent “aboutdamntime.jpg”_

 

**Ravi**

omg i hate you sm

 

**Major**

its a good picture tho

 

**Ravi**

ofc it is

look at us

flawless

 

**Major**

damn right

 

**Peyton**

OMGG finally???

took you guys long enough

 

**Ravi**

pfff

theres nothing wrong with our timing

 

**Liv**

except for all the drama?

and pining?

and dear god

the puppy eyes

 

**Major**

glad our relationship

could be of amusement

 

**Ravi**

there was no such a thing

lies and slander

you seem to be very confused here Liv

 

**Liv**

you cant deny it

the angst is strong in this shop

 

**Major**

i cant believe you’re using star wars against us

 

**Ravi**

liv

dont you have customers to attend

like the guy giving u the evil eye over there

 

**Liv**

shit right

still

glad you two finally worked it out

 

**Peyton**

i second that

especially cause i won the bet

 

**Major**

there was a bet????

i want half the spoils

 

**Peyton**

wtf why

 

**Ravi**

why am i not surprised

 

**Major**

i demand a part on this

i did all the hard work

 

**Ravi**

well

half of it

 

**Major**

true

we can split the money

or

use it to go to the fanciest place around

 

**Ravi**

i see your offer

and i raise you this:

imagine all the piZZA WE COULD BUY

 

**Major**

dude

damn

i love u

babe lets go buy all the pizzas

 

**Peyton**

you guys are so cute

but stay the hell away from my money

gtg ppl

 

**Major**

babe

bro

sweetheart

love

 

**Ravi**

yes darling?

sweetie

honey

cupcake

 

**Clive**

why am i here?

nevermind

 

_Clive left “The Coffee Squad”._

 

**Major**

i think we broke him

 

**Ravi**

less typing

more kissing

 

***

**Author's Note:**

> Hey,
> 
> if you liked this, consider dropping a comment or giving kudos, or, of course, you can come chat with me on _[my tumblr](http://wearealltalesintheend.tumblr.com/)_
> 
> Tomorrow the long story will be posted, so keep an eye out. Or not. I don't know. Whatever. I was going somewhere with this sentence, I know I had a point somewhere- 
> 
> Anyway, see y'all tomorrow.
> 
> And hey? Thanks.


End file.
